As a single girl trying to ace that career, exercise well, eat right, maintain her sanity, and still make time to hang out with friends and family, it often makes me stop and wonder if I’ll actually end up forever alone. I mean, how many men will I need to sort through before I meet ‘the one’? And most importantly, how long will this gruelling process take? Should I assign months, years, or even decades? Mathematically speaking, that’s a helluva lot of precious time swiping left and right, making small talk, and crying over heartbreaks.
Okay, no one can actually give me an exact number or time frame because it’ll probably happen when I least expect it, but according to Tala Scott, founder of Evolve Today and relationship expert and author, there are seven men I will meet before I meet my perfect match – and this applies for all women. In Scott’s new book ‘Heaven on Earth Begins: the Seven Stages of Love’, she does exactly that – investigates the seven stages of dating before you find Mr Right.
Scott wants us to stop making the same mistakes, stop dating the same f**kboys, and instead make sure we women find that long-term happiness we all deserve. But to do this, Scott advises you have to kiss seven types of Mr Wrong until you find your Mr Darcy. So, which one’s have you ticked off? And who are you yet to tick off?
1. Mr Grey
AKA 50 Shades of mood swings/mixed messages/knowing the unknown.
“He wants you close enough to exercise control, but never closer than arm’s length emotionally,” Scott says. “His intrigue is a product of being emotionally distant, and he still carries the baggage of his first heartbreak. Don’t think you can change him! Love should not be difficult.” Amen, sister.
2. Mr McDreamy
Scott describes this as the person who “feels like your soul-mate” and the relationship “is a fulfilling and beautiful experience.”
“This loving relationship based on care and mutual understanding, arms you with the tools and knowledge of how to love.”
If it doesn’t work out between the two of you, don’t cry because Scott advises that this relationship will have taught you self-mastery and inner confidence – two qualities that will make you the ultimate #bosslady.
3. Mr Unavailable
“Mr Unavailable can’t offer you one or more of these connections: heart, body, soul and mind,” Scott explains. “This relationship isn’t a complete, full love. This man is emotionally, mentally or physically unavailable.” And he needs to be said goodbye to. ASAP.
4. Mr Upgrade
“Mr Upgrade has a strong connection to your soul and an even better understanding of the real you. There is a spiritual magnetism to your relationship, and an attraction to the soul.”
But as perfect as it may seem, there is one significant flaw: “… this soulful attraction often can’t translate due to an unhealed past relationship that will interfere with your intimate connection.”
5. Mr Variety
If you haven’t seen the film ‘The Other Woman’, then add it to your holiday to-do list – now. Basically, Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann and Kate Upton play three women who are all romantically involved with the same douche bag AKA Mr Variety.
Scott describes this type as “the charming centre of attention that can’t seem to keep his eyes on one girl.”
“This heartthrob will be in and out of your life in a flash once the connection gets too intense for him, leaving you burning for more and wondering what went wrong.” Girlfriend, this one has danger written all over it. Save yourself the heartbreak and time.
6. Mr Duality
“Mr Duality is your twin in terms of your values, thoughts and strengths, with a deep sense of care and protection in your relationship.”
Sounds like Mr Darcy, right?
Well… “There is always some sort of difficulty when it comes to entering a committed relationship, and it is often due to unrequited romantic love.”
7. Mr Darcy
Simply put, every girl deserves to find their very own Colin Firth, ahem, I mean Mr Darcy.
“Your search is over when you meet your love of a lifetime, Mr Darcy. The love is complete in the heart, body, soul and mind, and the love is unconditional. He sees nothing but perfection and beauty in you and makes you see it in yourself, too. This Divine Union Relationship shows you how easy true love can really be!”
True love does exist, and it’s waiting for you out there.
Tala’s book ‘Heaven on Earth Begins: The Seven Stages of Love’ is currently available to purchase here.